My Cartoon Network

OK, I have got to talk about the television, which takes me back a couple a months.

Friends of mine visited Portland from the east coast. It was great to see familiar faces. Coincidentally, her sister lives here for which I am thankful. During her and her daughters visit I had to become a little more acclimated with the city for her sister lives about 30 minutes from me on the NE side of town. I was able to get to her house (with some help) which actually felt liberating. This drive led me to my discussion about television.

You know, getting in a car for 30 minutes, driving aimlessly in a big city on a big highway in a direction with uncertainty can be challenging. And add to this three children in the car with you who can behave unpredictably. I know this is true for most children so don't get me wrong, it can be expected unless, of course, the children are "perfect" as mine are and yours too. ;)

So without a doubt, I turned on the car DVD player.

Now what you have to realize is in Oregon, it seems, this is sort of frowned upon. In fact, it seems that TV, in general, is not used very much. I have yet to see a car here with a DVD player. Good for them, right? Children should be outside exploring, playing or finding things on their own to do to entertain themselves. Don't get me wrong I find this to be a good thing but there are moments when I feel the need to use television in order to keep my sanity or just simply to calm things down a bit when I feel the house is completely out of order.

So, in the car, my thought was, "Hey, better to drive safely and be able to concentrate then take the chance that I may have to turn my body completely around to discipline a child, break up a fight, or reason with someone (which we all know is not the easiest to do with an almost 7 y.o, a 5 1/2, and 3 1/2 y.o.), or even worse, get so distracted by them that I run off the road, flip the car three times or run into some sort of wildlife which in Oregon does not seem to be all that far fetched".

Now one must be thinking that I am assuming that my children will act up. Oh no, that is not the case, well maybe. As a mother, I never know what will be dealt to me. We think we can predict it all. Why, because I am a mother. But, realistically, the way I think something is going to go may end up the opposite. So, for "safety reasons", a movie was played. They behaved beautifully and I enjoyed my coffee and drove safely. But then again we were on an adventure and usually the rides to "somewhere new" are good. It is the ride home but that is a whooole other discussion.

Now back to TV. In the home, I, of course, only put the TV on if I feel my children are going to soon be swinging from the light fixtures, break a bone, break something, eyes are about to get clawed out, if I am using the gas stove and the children are under my feet, or if the mommy is getting the urge to let loose on a child. I describe the television as a resource and yes, I do think it is a resource.

As a mother, I have patience. Actually, more than I thought I could ever have. It is amazing what I am able to endure. Children love you to death but at the same time somehow are able to beat up on you emotionally. A close friend of mine describes this to feel like little birdies pecking at your temple. I thought that was nicely put. It is not a feeling you enjoy but you can bare. Don't get me wrong, I have my irrational emotional moments where I feel I am literally losing my mind, but thankfully it is short lived.

I know the children do not mean to act this way. I do not ever feel like it is a deliberate thing. I remember they are only children. Children are learning how to respond to their surroundings, deal with their hardships, accept the word "no", and understand what is acceptable and what is not. However, I am who they feel most comfortable with and what better person to be emotional with, cry with, yell at, whine at, or simply loose control. I will not reject them for that is not my job. I am here to mold them, educate them, love them, hug them, talk to them, teach how to be rational, and keep them safe. The list can go on but I will stop there for I am sure you get my point. So "no" I do not think a little TV here and there is such a bad thing, despite what others think or what the media says. How goes the old saying "anything in moderation is ok".

I also find it to be comforting. The children will snuggle up, relax, and enjoy this time. Their little brains can veg out. They rest their bodies and get great pleasure out of the stories, as do most adults.

I always say do what works and what's best for you no matter what the situation is. Just don't forget to take the time to give your children the opportunity to do those things that help them to create, learn, make decisions, make mistakes, ask questions, get a little hurt through exploration (such as racing down a hill on a scooter crashing towards the bottom ending up with numerous scrapes, bumps, and bruises), and see things through their own eyes.