September 24th - Ok, so I am now down to the wire. My Florida tag expires in a matter of days. I have to study for the Oregon driving test so I can retake it with the hopes of not being humiliated again.
I decide, first, I need to go for a run - but instead I ran late and missed the group so I thought I would get on the bike for a while and force myself to read the driving manual. Ten minutes into it I was extremely bored and decided to try out a Kick Boxing class. Which I have to say was truly hilarious. I have not done an organized aerobic class in probably 10 years.
I went in the wrong direction, had others facing me when I was supposed to be turned around, had arms going in the wrong direction, legs flailing trying to keep up with the moves - nearly kicking my neighbors and tried to convince myself I was getting it. I just had to laugh knowing others could see how idiotic I looked through the windows. But you know, whatever! I actually had a decent workout and am willing to go back for more! One thing I have learned as I get older is you only look as foolish as you feel. Typically, you are not the only one trying it out for the first time and if you are -LAUGH AT YOURSELF- it actually feels refreshing.
Off to the DMV - after a shower, of course. I stopped at the Starbucks next store to get some caffeine in me to help with my need for alertness and improved concentration. I walked in the DMV and it was empty. Good sign - I thought. After I checked in (the new lady today was friendlier and even had a sense of humor) I asked if I could sit down and study. I was feeling pretty good. I was by myself at a table. Nice and quiet. I felt calm. Brought back memories of the college library. When...
I hear the woman call a number and no one answered and I thought, "how strange" so I looked up and made eye contact with a young woman (in her twenties). I got a wierd feeling in my stomach (as I often do right before something out of the ordinary happens). She looked a little strung out and a few seconds later she realized it was her number. She went up to the attendant and proceeded to get a tag. A question was asked of her for which she did not know the answer so she yelled out to the young man she was with. He proved to be not so nice.
He came right up to the counter and let the attendant have it. Not in your typical way such as "what am i missing or what is the problem?" He basically told her she was "white tr--- and did not know what the h--- she was doing and that she was a b----." Further asking her how she could not realize what the young girl had was the correct information. The young girl stepped away. He was asked to take an seat and calm down.
At that point I thought hmmmm "is he armed?" " Where could I go if I needed to hide since I chose an area to study furthest away from the door. The bathroom was my best bet.
He told the attendant he was not going to calm down since "he was not worked up" and yelled out to her "do you want to see the end of your work day?" I tensed up. She asks him to leave. His body language changed - very angry, fierce, agititated - Cleeeearly anger management issues!
Probably was in some anger management classes, history of mental health treatment, or had a probation officer. If not I thought he could use some sort of therapy/medication or should have a probation officer. Trying to make light of the situation I thought, I'll be the ARNP so "Let's assess this guy and the situation." Maybe Intermittent Explosive Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, Impulse Control Disorder, or some type of personality disorder (which would be the scariest scenario since that is the hardest to treat). Or just a criminal, although most criminals probably could be given a diagnosis.
He walked towards the attendant again (I, of course, never made eye contact with him) and he called her a "fu----- horror" and "useless c---". Not a young man with much manners but did make his point. He goes towards the door and still cannot pull himself together - yelling at her some more (other words you can imagine) and shoots her a nice bird.
So much for a calm environment. I start to wonder if he was going to come back with some sort of firearm and let loose on us. The attendant did follow him out to try to get his tag. I am not sure if she was able to for he spun off quickly. Well, he did have some sort of a brain so as to know he needed to get away quick. Such classy people in the world! Like he should be behind the wheel of a car.
This situation did shed some light on why the DMV employees (who clearly have training on how how to handle situations like this for they followed the steps right from the book) are not the most warm and fuzzy people and are cynical. It still does not mean I should be treated like the way I was treated last week or any of you, of course, unless you behave badly.
Long and short of it is, I passed my test, did not get shot, and looked cute in my photo. I did, however, ask if the photo came out "ok" before I walked away. Funny enough she says "Yes, I think it came out fine. You know you really have GREAT HAIR!" I just had to laugh.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Bad Hair Day, Part 3
September 17, 2008, Part 3...Trying to regain my composure and improve my mood I headed to the FedEx store. I missed them yesterday when they tried to deliver my new cell phone. Once I got there, after having some difficulty finding it, the attendant tells me they do not have the phone because they try three times to deliver to the house. Since this was only the first attempt, they were going to try again. So I did not need to be there. No where on the paper they left on my door did it say that. Sooo I smile and gave the permission needed for them to deliver without me home.
I get back in the car and having not been rude, not yelled at anyone, not cried and just plain holding in all that emotion from the earlier part of my morning, I decided it was ok to let out a few tears and I did. I thought I would feel a lot better if I went for a run but the hairstylist suggested not to wash my hair for 24 hours (she gave me a conditioning treatment because my hair was so badly damaged). Later, I opted for an adult beverage.
Amazing, the things we deal with, the people we encounter, the frustrations we go through. I was telling my local friend (the one who teaches pole dancing and who runs with me) about my day and she says to me she can top that. She had just left the doctor to have her injured foot reassessed and he told her she had to be completely off it for 4 more weeks. I thought well that is worse and is much more difficult than dealing with the craziness I had in just a few hours.
So it is all relative. It still does not erase the fact that I still wanted to jump over the counter at that lady. However, I can look back, laugh, and (tomorrow) put on my running shoes. Bad days can help us to regain our composure, step back and look at the bigger picture. I guess that is what separates me from a sociopath. Thank God.
Sooo:
1. My hair will grow back - I still look cute
2. I will pass the test, get an Oregon tag and license and I guess evolve into an Oregonian (I still think I'll always be a Floridian) and
3. I did get my new pink Blackberry pearl and I will become proficient in using it. I will. I will. I will.
HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!!
My new phone.
I get back in the car and having not been rude, not yelled at anyone, not cried and just plain holding in all that emotion from the earlier part of my morning, I decided it was ok to let out a few tears and I did. I thought I would feel a lot better if I went for a run but the hairstylist suggested not to wash my hair for 24 hours (she gave me a conditioning treatment because my hair was so badly damaged). Later, I opted for an adult beverage.
Amazing, the things we deal with, the people we encounter, the frustrations we go through. I was telling my local friend (the one who teaches pole dancing and who runs with me) about my day and she says to me she can top that. She had just left the doctor to have her injured foot reassessed and he told her she had to be completely off it for 4 more weeks. I thought well that is worse and is much more difficult than dealing with the craziness I had in just a few hours.
So it is all relative. It still does not erase the fact that I still wanted to jump over the counter at that lady. However, I can look back, laugh, and (tomorrow) put on my running shoes. Bad days can help us to regain our composure, step back and look at the bigger picture. I guess that is what separates me from a sociopath. Thank God.
Sooo:
1. My hair will grow back - I still look cute
2. I will pass the test, get an Oregon tag and license and I guess evolve into an Oregonian (I still think I'll always be a Floridian) and
3. I did get my new pink Blackberry pearl and I will become proficient in using it. I will. I will. I will.
HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!!
My new phone.Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Bad Hair Day, Part 2
September 17th, Part 2...I drive to the DMV. Since my Fl tag expires at the end of this month I am having to get this done. I am really not emotionally ready to get rid of my Florida tag. It just makes things seem more permanent. I get there and take a number. It is not too crowded which I am glad about.
My number is quickly called. I go up to the lady sitting behind the counter. For some reason my anxiety level rises-probably because you had to bring tons of paperwork proving this and that and all I could think about was "she is going to tell me I forgot something". She flipped though this, that, and the other and she gets to my SS card and then looks at my birth certificate and questions my middle name change. I explain it is pretty common to make your middle name your maiden name but apparently not in her world. She says " I have to go get this approved" I think (keeping to myself of course) "whatever lady do what you need to do". Fortunately, the "head" lady tells her indeed that is fairly common.
She moves on to review the other stuff. Do you own you car? she asks. "Yes", I reply. "Then can you show me your title?" I think no where did it say to bring that along. I read what was needed 10 times since I had heard on the news what a pain this was. So I say "no" then she asks if I had my emissions report and again I say "no" thinking no one told me that was a requirement.
At this point I am feeling like such an idiot despite the fact that we all know "I CLEARLY am NOT". I was trying to remain calm so as to be able to get through the rest of this painful process. Sooo the next thing is to take the Oregon Drivers License test. At this point, I had not read the book but I was so at my wits end and I thought, "oh how hard can it be. I'll just take it and see what happens." So I am sure we can all guess the answer to that with my horrible anxiety that rears it's nasty head anytime I am tested. Yes, I failed!
So I have to get another number to go back up to one of these ever so pleasant women. I get to a different woman and she stridently asked why I was back up there-not in a low voice by any means. So I tell her "quietly" I failed. She then proceeds to repeat that in her same "not so low" voice. At that point, I try not to jump over the counter and strangle this woman who has bad hair color, is wearing an 80's outfit and has ridiculous fake nails. I was boiling thinking "yes, let's tell the whole room I failed" and now feeling as if all eyes are on me. I think, "you want to comment on my new hair cut while your thinking about how I failed the test, go right ahead". I did not want the stinkin' Oregon license (with a photo of my new hair) or tag anyway.
Trying to get past my emotions and hold on to my dignity. I change the subject asking where to go to get the emissions test done. She looks at me as if I have two heads so I look back at her and calmly and politely say I am from Florida and I would like some directions please. Really wanting to say "Listen lady how the heck would I know where this place is? I am from 3000 miles away, barely know my way around and that place would not be on the top of my list as something I would ever want to know. Got it." She gave me the directions but I was so embarrassed and worked up that I really did not hear a word she said so I asked where the bathroom was so as not to turn around to face all those behind me.
But then that was not such a good idea because I got to see my hair again which just upset me more.
I leave with my same Florida tag and Florida license. I will have to take this on another day.
To make myself feel better I decided to go to FedEx to get my new phone (the blackberry pearl). Yes, I will be more "connected" to the world. I "get it" now.
Stay tuned for the rest of my day...
My number is quickly called. I go up to the lady sitting behind the counter. For some reason my anxiety level rises-probably because you had to bring tons of paperwork proving this and that and all I could think about was "she is going to tell me I forgot something". She flipped though this, that, and the other and she gets to my SS card and then looks at my birth certificate and questions my middle name change. I explain it is pretty common to make your middle name your maiden name but apparently not in her world. She says " I have to go get this approved" I think (keeping to myself of course) "whatever lady do what you need to do". Fortunately, the "head" lady tells her indeed that is fairly common.
She moves on to review the other stuff. Do you own you car? she asks. "Yes", I reply. "Then can you show me your title?" I think no where did it say to bring that along. I read what was needed 10 times since I had heard on the news what a pain this was. So I say "no" then she asks if I had my emissions report and again I say "no" thinking no one told me that was a requirement.
At this point I am feeling like such an idiot despite the fact that we all know "I CLEARLY am NOT". I was trying to remain calm so as to be able to get through the rest of this painful process. Sooo the next thing is to take the Oregon Drivers License test. At this point, I had not read the book but I was so at my wits end and I thought, "oh how hard can it be. I'll just take it and see what happens." So I am sure we can all guess the answer to that with my horrible anxiety that rears it's nasty head anytime I am tested. Yes, I failed!
So I have to get another number to go back up to one of these ever so pleasant women. I get to a different woman and she stridently asked why I was back up there-not in a low voice by any means. So I tell her "quietly" I failed. She then proceeds to repeat that in her same "not so low" voice. At that point, I try not to jump over the counter and strangle this woman who has bad hair color, is wearing an 80's outfit and has ridiculous fake nails. I was boiling thinking "yes, let's tell the whole room I failed" and now feeling as if all eyes are on me. I think, "you want to comment on my new hair cut while your thinking about how I failed the test, go right ahead". I did not want the stinkin' Oregon license (with a photo of my new hair) or tag anyway.
Trying to get past my emotions and hold on to my dignity. I change the subject asking where to go to get the emissions test done. She looks at me as if I have two heads so I look back at her and calmly and politely say I am from Florida and I would like some directions please. Really wanting to say "Listen lady how the heck would I know where this place is? I am from 3000 miles away, barely know my way around and that place would not be on the top of my list as something I would ever want to know. Got it." She gave me the directions but I was so embarrassed and worked up that I really did not hear a word she said so I asked where the bathroom was so as not to turn around to face all those behind me.
But then that was not such a good idea because I got to see my hair again which just upset me more.
I leave with my same Florida tag and Florida license. I will have to take this on another day.
To make myself feel better I decided to go to FedEx to get my new phone (the blackberry pearl). Yes, I will be more "connected" to the world. I "get it" now.
Stay tuned for the rest of my day...
My Oregon DMV Specialist.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Bad Hair Day, Part 1
September 17, 2008-not a good hair day-literally. Soooo I have not had my hair cut since Tampa, which at this point means not since June. I had been putting it off because I had to find a new person after 10 years of the same person in Florida. Today, I take on that challenge.
I am referred to a very hip hair place in the Pearl District of Downtown Portland. I was a little nervous entrusting my hair to someone new but I thought "ok what the h--l, just do it already, girl your ends are hideous."
I am sitting in the hair stylists chair giving her the low down of my situation and she asks if I am opposed to cutting some length off, doing more layers and adding some "dimension" around my face. (I am thinking gosh that is a lot of suggestions-do I look that bad? HA HA, I actually thought I was looking pretty good.) Now mind you she shows me where she was talking about cutting the length up to and I thought "ok, not so bad, probably would make my face not look as long". She was attractive with good hair cut and color and seemed to know what she was doing so I just let her rip. But do they ever do exactly what they say they are going to do?? NO!
This place is so up to date that each stylist has an assistant so that she cuts and her assistant styles and she follows up. Needless to say 35 minutes later, after the assistant states "you took a lot off", did I realize the extent of the new "do" which involved a "pseudo bang" and lots of layers. I'm looking in the mirror-deep breath-not so bad. I say to myself "you needed a change, it can always grow back". However not real sure I liked it but knew it was a good cut-hip for an almost 38 year old (as of tomorrow) if I say so myself.
Plus I needed to go get an Oregon license (which not really sure I am ready for since I sooo love my Gator tag) so what better day than today to have a picture. The only other thought I had was "oh boy, the hubby is not going to like this" for as most of you know he is all about "all naturale"-long hair, no hair color, no make up, no added extras. "He looooooves me juuuust the way I am"-literally. So his comment was "it looks cute". Not quite sure what that meant. Most likely he liked it better longer. I was not so sure sure I liked it myself but too late now.
Sooooo next stop was to get the Oregon tag and license....(this escapade really added to my morning and I think it made me hate my hair even more). To be continued...
I am referred to a very hip hair place in the Pearl District of Downtown Portland. I was a little nervous entrusting my hair to someone new but I thought "ok what the h--l, just do it already, girl your ends are hideous."
I am sitting in the hair stylists chair giving her the low down of my situation and she asks if I am opposed to cutting some length off, doing more layers and adding some "dimension" around my face. (I am thinking gosh that is a lot of suggestions-do I look that bad? HA HA, I actually thought I was looking pretty good.) Now mind you she shows me where she was talking about cutting the length up to and I thought "ok, not so bad, probably would make my face not look as long". She was attractive with good hair cut and color and seemed to know what she was doing so I just let her rip. But do they ever do exactly what they say they are going to do?? NO!
This place is so up to date that each stylist has an assistant so that she cuts and her assistant styles and she follows up. Needless to say 35 minutes later, after the assistant states "you took a lot off", did I realize the extent of the new "do" which involved a "pseudo bang" and lots of layers. I'm looking in the mirror-deep breath-not so bad. I say to myself "you needed a change, it can always grow back". However not real sure I liked it but knew it was a good cut-hip for an almost 38 year old (as of tomorrow) if I say so myself.
Plus I needed to go get an Oregon license (which not really sure I am ready for since I sooo love my Gator tag) so what better day than today to have a picture. The only other thought I had was "oh boy, the hubby is not going to like this" for as most of you know he is all about "all naturale"-long hair, no hair color, no make up, no added extras. "He looooooves me juuuust the way I am"-literally. So his comment was "it looks cute". Not quite sure what that meant. Most likely he liked it better longer. I was not so sure sure I liked it myself but too late now.
Sooooo next stop was to get the Oregon tag and license....(this escapade really added to my morning and I think it made me hate my hair even more). To be continued...
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